Please Mind The Gap!!!

If you guessed what i am talking about the instant you read the title, you have probably guessed it right. It is the Lifeline of Delhi i am gonna talk about….The Delhi Metro. I have spent quite some time in Delhi over the past few years but all this time I had been relying on other means of transportation (well dad’s car mostly). I have used the services of the Delhi Metro in the past but the use has been quite sporadic and that too in mostly non-rush hours. Therefore it wasn’t until I started my intern at Panasonic,Gurgaon that I had a taste of what I call “The Metro Experience”….

Over the past few days, I have spent close to 14% of my entire day inside the metro and believe me that’s a lot of time to have life experiences about anything. Now, I do appreciate the air conditioning inside the trains. But what I appreciate even more, is actually the rising temperature inside the trains as more and more stations pass by…if u know what I mean. It’s kinda depressing when you see the heat sources interacting with lowly scumbags. Still there is a positive aspect to it. The heat sources with the highest source temperatures are actually positioned in the non-reserved compartments…..and I will say that again, If you know what I mean ;)…

I believe that I am a calm person but the next person who lectures me about feminism and male dominance is surely gonna get an earful from me. You want to be treated equally but even one entire reserved compartment wasn’t enough. You want the reserved seats inside non reserved compartments too. I learned it the hard way when not even 10 minutes into my first 95 minutes metro journey (I was so happy that I had found a seat), a girl, 3-4 years older than me, promptly comes to me and says, “Seat reserved for ladies”…and that’s how I lost my seat.  What pissed me more was that even the temperature wasn’t even high enough (yes dear feminists, I just objectified women…..Bite me!!). I wanted to tell that gal, “Yes, I know it’s a seat reserved for ladies and I will vacate it when I see one”. But I avoided it as I didn’t want any tussle on the first day of my intern!! Still that seat (be it only for 10 minutes) felt so great that I modified a saying for the metro…..”It is better to have sat and lost than to have never sat at all”

And now a word about the Rajiv Chowk station experience. I guess Delhites and NCRites must be knowing this. But for those who don’t, fill a balloon with water till you think that it couldn’t hold anymore and then fill some more. Now take a pin and pop it. The way people come out of a train at Rajiv Chowk is actually similar to the way the water escapes the bursting balloon. And it’s not official but Ripley’s Believe It Or Not are actually gonna feature this in their next segment……”A person, not female, not old or physically challenged, as ordinary as you are, boarded a train at the Rajiv Chowk Metro Station, New Delhi during the great office rush and got A SEAT!”

I am going to quote a line here from one of my all time favorite stories, The Luncheon…”I do not believe that I am a vindictive man, but when the immortal gods take a hand in the matter it is pardonable to observe the result with complacency.” I quoted it because of the following incident. An old guy (I’m guessing 80) asked me, “Beta, can you help me board this train?”. I immediately saw my golden chance and said, “Sure”. I helped him get on the train and said, “Let’s find you a seat now.” You know how you can spot a feminist in a crowd. You see one and you have seen all of them (yes i am stereotyping right now….again, Bite Me!!). So I promptly went up to her and said, “Hi, I don’t think uncle can stand any longer, would you offer your seat?”……And judging from the look she gave me, I knew I had my Revenge!!

So people, if you have missed any of the above experiences, you haven’t had…”The Metro Experience”…..

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